Sometimes I think about Thomas Jefferson, and I remember that he probably had an ancestor whose dad was named Jeffer.

Catholicism: Jesus is here to save your immortal soul, but he wants you to at least feel bad about it.

My wife keeps using "Taint Week" as the reason to do or not do things this week.

"Oops! I didn't load the dishwasher, but it's taint week."

Is this a thing?

I like Three Kings Day, but now it sounds weird if you say you want to celebrate January 6th.

My wife thought it was Torey La Nez AKA Torey the nose!

Art tip: You can vary your identity based on audience and what you wish to convey about yourself. Use Art, Artie, or Arthur freely.